3 Keys Thursday: 3 Keys for Syncing Schedules

Dodgerton Skillhause via Morguefile

My husband took last Friday off. While it seems that a three-day weekend in the summer would be a great thing (and it was for him), it's only a great thing all around if everyone is off. What he saw as a spur-of-the-moment vacation day ("Let's do stuff!") I saw as an obstacle to my productivity ("I already have stuff to do!")

Did I mention that I work from home?

Last minute decisions challenge me, even when there's fun involved. On the one hand, I admire the spontaneity and feel as though I should (oops -- there's that word again) be better at rolling with it. On the other hand, when I've laid out my work assuming a five-day week, fun, spontaneous and "rolling with it" are nowhere to be found. When one part of me says, "lighten up!" while the other part of me says, "you have deadlines!" it can be challenging to satisfy both sides.

As with many other aspects of organizing and time management, I'm a work-in-progress when situations like these arise. Here are three keys I'm trying in an effort to satisfy all of me.

Show myself some respect. I feel guilty being unenthusiastic when my husband announces a day off with little prior notice, especially when I respond with precisely the amount of enthusiasm I feel. But -- and I mean this without malice -- why should I feel guilty that I'm not enthusiastic about all of my plans being tossed into the air? Still, while it's natural to feel frustrated when my best-laid plans get sidetracked, I can change the way I respond. I can acknowledge that the day off is a great thing for him, while also explaining that I have plans I might not be able -- or willing -- to change.

Accept the things I cannot change -- and not just the things on my list. If my husband is going to be home, my day is going to look different. There will be noise where there is usually quiet. My freedom to work in places besides my office may be curtailed. I might have to settle for accomplishing less than I'd hoped to. From a practical perspective, anything that has a deadline may be immovable, rendering me truly unavailable for part -- or all -- of the day. Determining what is truly non-negotiable is the first step to letting go of the shoulds and the guilt and figuring out where flexibility fits in.

Have the courage to change the things I can. Discretionary items, on the other hand, are not immovable. Unlike deadlines, which need to stay on the list, things I wanted to do (or was looking forward to doing) fit into the category of things I can change -- if I choose to. While separating the "must do" items from the "want to do" items takes me a step closer to satisfying the side of me that says, "lighten up," it's only a first step. Whether or not I actually want to replace those things with other things is another discussion.

Are you thinking that this seems like an awful lot of thinking for a day off? Yeah. Me too. But what's at stake here is more than just a deadline or a to-do list. It's about priorities. When a family member is suddenly available for a day off on a weekday, finding the want to do/must do balance impacts more than to-do lists; it impacts relationships.

Which is exactly what makes this whole thing so complicated in the first place.

How about you? What do you do when your schedule comes undone? Is it as simple as ditching the list and seizing the day?

Wednesday Evening Musings

Good evening, friends! I started out the day on top of things, posting the link to today's visit to the Inspired Prompt blog (thanks for having me back, ladies!). Then, I went off to teach, today's post for this blog running through my head.

And now it's 8:30 p.m. and the post hasn't left my head and made it to the page yet. Some days are like that.

BilliTheCat via Pixabay

Like my schedule, my closet has reached that point, except that with my closet, the balance is better. One in? Maybe. One out? Definitely.

Most of what I'm weeding is easy to let go of -- and that's coming from someone who's definitely not a ruthless de-clutterer.  When I retired seven years ago, I slowly (and cheaply) restocked my casual basics -- jeans, solid color tees, sweaters, and tank tops for layering -- because that was all I needed. I shopped sales and consignments and did a lot of one-in-every-color shopping.

Seven years later, those pieces are showing their age. A few are still holding their own, but most are earning failing grades in either fit or style, making it easy to dump them or donate them, depending on their condition.

As much as I love clear space, though, I'm reaching the point where clear space in my closet is becoming problematic. Everything's going, but not much is replacing it. That's great -- to a point. After all, how many clothes do we really need?

I don't have a good answer to that, but I do know that I'm at a turning point. Is the empty space in my closet a sign of a deficit, or an opportunity to rebalance and reorganize?

I'm choosing to look at it as an opportunity. For once, I actually feel as though there's enough space in my closet for everything I own which makes me want to seek another opportunity -- the opportunity to dig deeper and see what else can go. Usually, I get rid of things a little at a time, often after spending an entire day wearing something I didn't feel good in. Now, though, I see the chance not for a new wardrobe, but for a do-over.

So, I'll stick with slow and steady, weeding as I go and perhaps setting aside some time to dig deeper and create more room so I can actually see what I have and what I need. While I'm at it, this might be a good time to rearrange things and take my closet to a new level of organization.

Now if only it were that easy to weed out my schedule.

What a Week!

So...the book came out this week (I might have already told you -- and everyone I know -- that little tidbit). Deanna Bartalini posted a wonderful review on CatholicMom.com and, as I type this, Know Thyself: The Imperfectionist's Guide to Sorting Your Stuff is the #1 new release in self-help for Catholics, and is in the top 100 in three other categories. Wow. Just...wow.

This isn't just a book for Catholics, though -- it's a book for anyone who reads this blog, anyone who has struggled to get organized and/or has come to the conclusion that they're irredeemably disorganized. You're not. You're just a square peg, trying to fit into a round hole or, more accurately, given the shape of most containers, the other way around.

As I look at the I need to see it piles that have taken shape as I focused on writing and teaching and promotion, I see that I have some work to do, and so I'm going to dig in. But I'm not going to beat myself up. I'm just going to use my styles to restore some order.

You can check out the first chapter of Know Thyself here. I hear it's a pretty good read. :-)

If you live in the York, PA area and/or would like to join me in a book celebration (or two...or three...)

use the contact form to the right of this post to send me your email address so I can send you

celebration information :-)

Kicking the Obstacles off the Path

Dodgerton Skillhause via Morguefile

It's summer (well, almost), a time for simplifying as much as possible so we can free up more time for fun. 

Like anyone else, I have obstacles to overcome if I want to keep things neat and running smoothly. Whether these obstacles emerge directly from my I need to see it personal style (see piling, below) or crop up when I'm feeling tired and/or unmotivated, they create a roadblock on the path to organization. 

Here are a three particularly persistent obstacles I'm trying to eliminate.

Piling. When I get busy, my personal style and my default organizational style (drop and run) kick in. I put things down and leave them out instead of putting them away. I set stacks of things aside, intending to get to them later. This isn't too bad if the stacks are meaningful and this process doesn't go on for too long. But, when this habit continues unchecked, I end up with a major project on my hands.
Solution? Don't put it down, put it away. As often as possible.

Procrastination. More often than not, the most difficult part of a project for me is simply getting started. Once I stop whining and start doing, I generally build enough momentum to get wrapped up in the task I was dreading. In addition, I find it much easier than I expected it to be, especially once I start to see progress.
Solution? Give it five. Knowing I can stop after five minutes helps me get started. And, since getting started is half the problem, setting the timer and digging in is often all it takes to motivate me to see the task through to completion.

Not writing things down. This one creates less obvious chaos than the others, but it creates plenty of mental chaos. I have notepads in plenty of locations and designated places for particular lists. When it comes to not writing it down, I really have no excuse.
Solution? Just do it.

What action (or inaction) obstacles are littering your path to organization?

Some Days, the Shoulds Don't Win

It's 6:35. I have a meeting in twenty-five minutes and no blog post on the horizon. In the spirit of taking my own advice, I'm going to shun the shoulds (I should write a new post!) and simply post some good news instead.

On Monday, the author copies of my book arrived! Yesterday, I received an email telling me that my book had received the Catholic Writers' Guild Seal of Approval and my editor posted an unboxing of her own, featuring my book and two other new releases from Our Sunday Visitor.

It's been a busy couple of days.

Know Thyself: The Imperfectionist's Guide to Sorting Your Stuff takes the ideas I write about every Wednesday and Thursday and puts them neatly between two covers. Its publication doesn't mean the end of this blog -- just that it will be a lot easier to find what you're looking for all in one place where it's neatly indexed.

I hope you'll check it out.

3 Keys Thursday: 3 Key Areas of Success

So, yesterday, I wrote about the time I spent whipping my pile of exams to reference into shape. That got me to thinking about the places where I rarely let things go -- those spaces where order reigns on a regular basis. Here are three of them.

I make my bed. This wasn't always the case, but when I read in one of Marcia Ramsland's books about the percentage of the room that was made tidy by this simple task, I made it a daily habit. It's a rare day that my bed isn't made. Many days, the neatness inspired by this simple act nudges me to clear up another space as well.

I keep on top of incoming mail. While there are times that my mail piles up in the short term, I don't let it get far. It took me a really long time to get my mail counter (in my kitchen) organized to my satisfaction, so making sure not to revert to old bad habits is really important to me. Because keeping this clear space clear matters, I'm motivated to keep after it.

I put my bathrobe away. Sounds silly, I know, but I mention this one because it's both an exception to my drop and run organizational style and a pathway to corralling that habit in other areas as well. Because it's as easy to put it away as it is to put it down (strategy #1), I'm no longer tempted to drop it and run. In the spirit of full disclosure, I must confess that this is a habit I cultivated only after reminding myself on multiple occasions, "don't put it down, put it away." (strategy #2)

Every baby step we take is a step in the direction of ongoing organization. What steps will you take today? What successes can you already claim?

Why We Shouldn't Should Ourselves

Pixabay

Some days, I run headlong into my work-in-progress status.

Yesterday was one of those days.

I needed to prepare an exam for my summer class. Easy peasy. Go to the file, pull out last summer's exam....Okay, it's not exactly filed. It's sort of piled and it's kind of on the floor.

In the spirit of full disclosure, there's no sort of or kind of about it. It was a pile. And it was on the floor. 

Right next to the box where it should have been filed.

The problem was, the box this stack of exams belonged in was full.

And that was where the system began to fall apart.

Add to that a heaping dose of busyness, a full measure of a lack of time and three cups of "I'll get to that later" and what should have been a five-minute task....

Wasn't.

As I write this post, the pile has been duly sorted, the old exams culled and shredded and the ones I need placed in a file of their own. There is clear floor space where there should be clear floor space, order where there should be order and I know exactly where to find every exam I have a copy of. I'd feel accomplished if I weren't so busy being embarrassed by the fact that the pile never should have taken shape in the first place.

Uh oh. Did you see what I just did there?

I shoulded myself.

While it's true that exams don't belong in a pile on the floor, once they are, indeed, on the floor, no amount of shoulding changes that. All it does is waste the time and energy I sh- -- oops -- need to spend instead on restoring order.

I could keep shoulding myself. I could go on about how I shouldn't have put any of the papers on the floor and shouldn't have added to the pile once it started. I could focus on the fact that the box is still full and it wouldn't be if I'd tackled the folder at the bottom of the box like I should have if I were going to do the job perfectly.

Oops. There it is. Should's traveling companion. "Perfectly."

lukasbieri via Pixabay

My pile is gone. Culled. Shredded. Filed. Organized. I have what I need right in my hand. These are good things. This is progress. And "should" and "perfectly" only drag me away from what I have accomplished into the morass of what I haven't.

I'm not suggesting that I let myself off the hook for that last folder and throw a party because I put things where they belonged, but I am saying (yet again) that it's a process. Sometimes, knowing when to stop for the day is just as important as knowing where to start.

And it's always a good time to stop shoulding ourselves.