3 Keys Thursday: 3 Key New Year's Resolutions

Yesterday, I started thinking about my big picture goals for 2021 and, tomorrow, I'll set some monthly goals as I have for the past several years. Unless I miss my guess, a lot of people are pondering their goals for 2021. On my Twitter feed, I'm seeing a trend toward increased productivity.

It's like we haven't learned anything at all.

Sure, I hope 2021 means more time in public wearing something besides leggings and a tee shirt/sweatshirt (seasonal choices may vary) with a mask as my most important accessory. I hope I still fit into my church clothes when it's time to worship unmasked in a public space again.

But I don't want to forget that 2020 showed us what mattered in a fashion more stark than we could ever have imagined. Health. Loved ones. What essential really means. 

The value of downtime.

Yes, I want to be productive in 2021, but I don't want to forget the lessons of 2020. I want to accomplish things, but I don't feel a need to make up for lost time. So, with that in mind, I'm sharing three things I want to keep in the front of my mind for 2021. I don't do New Year's resolutions (more on that next week), but I do want to make sure I keep "progress" in the term "work-in-progress."  

Practice gratitude. There is always something to be thankful for, even if we sometimes need a bulldozer to unearth it. Ending each day with thoughts of gratitude for things large and small helps us sleep better and improves our overall outlook. Maybe we're only grateful that a seemingly interminable day came to an end or that the sheets on the bed are clean or that the heat (or air conditioning) is working. Our gratitudes don't need to achieve the status of world peace to remind us of the things that are going right in our world. Very often, it's the little things that make a difference.

Self-care. 2020 has shown us that living on the edge has limited appeal. When we are run down, we get sick. When we are overwhelmed, we get cranky. When we burn the candle at both ends, we make mistakes. I often find myself going back to the overused comparison of putting our own oxygen masks on first. This analogy gets used a lot because it makes sense. When others are depending on us, it's hard to take a break but often that's when a break yields the greatest payoff. 

Don't take on other people's stress. Part of self-care is knowing what's ours to resolve and what's not. Other people's emotional states can be contagious; when they panic, we can absorb that panic and behave in a similar fashion. Occasionally, those around us might even be offended if we manage to keep calm when they don't feel the situation calls for it. Before we act, though, it's wise to ask ourselves if the problem is ours to solve. Chances are we have plenty of responsibilities of our own. We can still be helpful without taking on those that belong to others.

How about you? Are there any lessons from 2020  you hope to carry forward into 2021?

2021 Goals and Ideals: Zooming in and Zooming Out

geralt via Pixabay

Last January, I decided to come up with 20 things I wanted to improve upon in 2020. They ranged from being more mindful and optimistic to decluttering and using less plastic. Then, each month, when I sat down to review and set monthly goals, I'd take a look at the list to see which three I'd done a particularly good job with that month and which ones I wanted to focus on in the month to come. This helped me to keep my list in mind in a low-key sort of way. I could have posted the list prominently, on the bathroom mirror, perhaps (I do have an I need to see it personal style, after all), but I preferred to let it whir away in the back of my mind instead. The idea was that the items were things to improve upon over time, not benchmarks to hit by a certain date. While this flies in the face of SMART goals, it worked for me, allowing me to make progress on a variety of ideas that mattered to me, rather than striving toward measurable, time-based goals.

How'd I do? Pretty well, overall. I made solid improvement on 17 or 18 of the twenty. I deemed one unrealistic (or at least in need of reworking). And the 20th item? I failed miserably. Oddly enough, that one (set a screen time curfew) seemed fairly straightforward pre-COVID but, somewhere between April and October, I stopped caring about doing it. No motivation, no progress.

As I move forward into 2021, I definitely want to do this again. Some of the items will stay on the list because, although I got better, there's still room for improvement. As I write this, I'm tinkering with the number, though, and leaning toward sticking with 20. While 21 things in 2021 doesn't sound too daunting, I'm hoping to be around for 2035 and 35 things in 2035 sounds a bit overwhelming. More important, the goal is baby steps, and making the list longer and longer doesn't seem to be in keeping with the theme. 

What does this have to do with organizing by STYLE, especially since some the things on my list had nothing to do with organizing? Lists like these go to the heart of Take small steps (the T in STYLE). When I write about taking small steps here, it's usually with respect to chipping away at organization-related projects or items on our to-do lists. But taking small steps is also the best way to get to big goals that mean something to us beyond simply restoring order and making day-to-day life run more smoothly.

geralt via Pixabay

The new year is a great time to think about these kinds of things. What kinds of small steps do we want to take toward ideas and ideals that are important to us? 

Maybe, for example, I want to be more spiritual or more mindful or more optimistic, or use less plastic, less paper, or just less in general. If I were crafting a SMART goal, I'd need to quantify these things and set a time frame in which to achieve my goal. But, if I'm developing a habit, I can simply keep these things in mind and look for opportunities to do them. The first (the SMART goal) is a focused way of taking one small step, while the second (more/less focus) is a broader approach that trains me to be open to opportunities I might otherwise miss. I could set a goal to take a reusable bag with me to the supermarket every week, for example, or I could keep in mind that I want to, as a rule, use less plastic. This might lead me to look around for ways to use less plastic, which could include regularly traveling with reusable bags, as well as getting a reusable water bottle and looking for alternatives to plastic sandwich and freezer bags. It might even lead me to consider the makeup of items I buy on a regular basis. 

Let me be clear. Both options have merit. In fact, every step on the way to our goals is a good one. I'm sure, though, that you've already identified the approach you think will work for you -- or maybe you want to do a little of both. It depends on your style, and it probably depends on the end point you have in mind as well.

Organizing by STYLE is based on our understanding of ourselves and what we know works for us. Once we've identified our styles and learned to think of what comes naturally as an asset, there's no limit to where that thinking can take us. So, for 2021, I will once again be making a list and checking it more than twice. 

Care to join me?

Lilly Cantabile via Pixabay

3 Keys Thursday: 3 Key Strategies for De-Grinchifying this Christmas

Although today's post is a 3 Keys Thursday post, it's not about organizing. As much as I love organizing and tout its value as a life skill, there is -- and you may want to sit down for this -- more to life than organizing.

This year, the holidays will be quite different for most of us, but they are still worth celebrating. Here are three things I plan to remember this year.

How lucky I am.  I know it sounds incredibly Pollyanna-ish, especially in a year like this one, but there's never been a better time to focus on gratitudes. I miss my mom more than ever at Christmas, and I can curl up in a ball and let that overtake me or I can focus on what -- and who -- I have. My daughter who, under normal circumstances, might be miles away in a place of her own. My husband, who does so many little things -- like going to the grocery store for the one item I always seem to need when I bake. My dad, who's just around the corner, instead of more than a hundred miles away in my home state. My friends, who I see mostly on social media for now, but with whom I look forward to celebrating...soon (I hope). There may be things we don't have, but why let those take us away from what we do have?

wixin_56 via Pixabay

Not all Christmases will be like this one. We've been so isolated for so long that it seems as though normalcy may never return -- and it may not return in the way with which we're most familiar. But not every Christmas will be a lockdown Christmas. This year, we need to focus on the traditions that matter, and perhaps treat ourselves to some new ones, too. I splurged on some special hot chocolate which we may consume after our live-streamed Mass tonight and maybe instead of champagne on New Year's Eve as well -- or maybe with a family movie between Christmas and the new year. And, as someone who'd rather write than bake, I'm not entirely sorry to not have to bake as many cookies this year. Maybe this is the year to move from "we never do that" to "why not try it?"

JillWellington via Pixabay

Why we celebrate in the first place. Even the Grinch figured this one out:

“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.” (Dr. Seuss, How the Grinch Stole Christmas)

Christmas is a day to celebrate the birth of a child who changed the world. Even if Christmas doesn't mean that to you, it's hard to deny that it's about life and rebirth and if it can come "without packages, boxes or bags," well then, it can come during a pandemic, too.

This Christmas will be different -- that much is true. And, while some of us are in undeniably terrible circumstances, where finding even a spark of gratitude is challenging, many of us are mourning a loss that is much more like the packages, tags, ribbons and bags.  

We are here. Christmas is here. Let's celebrate.

AnnaliseArt via Pixabay

Strategy Transferred

Pixabay

Lately, I've been catching up on some organizing. In the process of sorting and weeding, I've rediscovered books I tucked away to read. Some go immediately to a home on one of the shelves that houses my to-be-read books. There, they will duly wait their turn to capture my attention in 50 pages or less. Harsh, perhaps, but with so many books I want to read, and so many new ones coming out regularly and clamoring for my attention, I have to have some sort of standard for what stays and what goes.

Some of the books I've uncovered are novels, but most are non-fiction and/or the sort of book that I chip away at; most of the books that fit into that final category are collections of essays or devotionals that lend themselves to a few pages of daily reading. The trouble is, the collection has expanded to a size that, at the rate of a few pages a day, will take me decades to finish.

Most of these are not new. Many haven't retained the appeal they had when I purchased them, but some spark a desire to pick them up again. 

The other day, I found one of those books mixed in with some files. I'd set it aside when I sorted a bookshelf, intending to pick it up and read a little bit each day.

That was at least two months ago. And there it sat -- unread -- and part of a pile that was a bit of a mixed bag, to boot.

So, I did what I do with other maybe items. I put it with the books (yes, that's plural) I'm currently working on and put a sticker on it with the date and a note to myself: 

"Donate if unopened within 30 days."

I've used this tactic with other items before, but never with a book. Still, if this is a book I really want to read a little at a time, thirty days of winter vacation gives me plenty of time to make that happen. If I open it, and like what I read, I can cross out the first date and replace it with the date that it was opened. 

Part of Organizing by STYLE -- or any organizing strategy, for that matter -- is finding what works for you and extending it to other spaces and situations. As I write about this new endeavor in my quest to create a TBR pile shorter than I am, I'm not sure if I'm more excited to pull the book out and read it or pull  the book out and donate it.

Either way, I win. 

3 Keys Thursday: 3 Keys to Managing One-More-Thing-Itis

Do you suffer from one-more-thing-itis? If you consistently find yourself trying to squeeze in just one more thing before you:

      a) head out the door;

      b) start a new task;

      c) go to bed;

      d) sit down and relax;

      e) any and/or all of the above....

...you might have one-more-thing-itis.

This affliction is especially prevalent around the holidays when seasonal to-do lists augment our regular to-do lists. And, while it's not all bad, it does have down sides. It can: 

        a) make us late; 

        b) enable procrastination; 

        c) interfere with our ability to get enough sleep; 

        d) exhaust us; and 

        e) all of the above. 

As you might have guessed, I suffer from one-more-thing-itis. Since I'm unlikely to ditch this habit any time soon, I've decided I need to finesse it a little; Organizing by STYLE is built, after all, on turning liabilities into assets. Here are a few things I use to keep it in check.

Set a deadline. I'm less likely to fall prey to one-more-thing-itis when I have a clearly determined end time. Sure, I might try to sneak in a couple of extra tasks, but when I know when I'm supposed to stop, I'm less likely to run it down to the wire.

Set an alarm. Another problematic part of this habit is that I lose track of time. Once I've set my deadline, I need to also set an alarm. That way, my deadline doesn't come and go, leaving me scrambling to get out the door on time, apologies in tow.

manfredsteger via Pixabay

Write it down. An alarm announcing my pre-set deadline might sound before I've finished my task. In order to fight the urge to finish just this one thing, I need to remind myself that tomorrow is another day and employ some list-making strategies. If it's already on the list, I can highlight it, circle it, star it or put a big #1 beside it as a promise to myself to give it priority when I have the time to do so. If it's not already on the list, I can add it. 

None of these is a long-term solution, however, Until we one-more-thing-itis sufferers learn to prize our time, our rest, and our peace of mind as much as we prize our productivity, this habit is likely to interfere with all of those things. While some days, we have no choice but to get through the list, often, we power through more out of habit than anything else. Asking ourselves if the thing we're doing now must be done now is a good way of assessing whether this learned behavior is working in our service or vice versa. And, if we decide to continue with the task-at-hand, we know we're doing so by choice, not habit.

And that's a key to success.

True Confessions Wednesday: Small Steps and Turning Points

True Confession #50: For me, taking small steps has many benefits.

At the end of every semester, there are things to organize. Because I collected no physical papers this semester, there were fewer things to file but, because I have an I need to see it personal style, things were hardly paperless. Consequently, one of my first endeavors at the end of the semester is to tie up loose ends and put everything away, preferably in a place where it will be easy to access.

Inevitably, this leads to a reorganization of my (home) office as well. Because of the pandemic, my campus visits were direct and as brief as possible. Put on my mask, walk to class, teach and leave. Other than a once-weekly visit to my mailbox, that was it. I visited my on-campus office only once all semester, to check for a book I needed. As a result, everything I needed for class, from textbooks to the last little note jotted on a scrap of paper, lived in my home office. 

No matter how well organized I am throughout the semester, things get hectic in the final crunch, leading to lots of those little notes to myself -- things to remember, things to do differently (or again) next semester, new resources to check out. I plan on paper, too, as I really need to see it when I'm sketching out readings, discussions and assignments. 

When I set up my system at the start of the semester (a single drop spot for everything I used on a regular basis, in keeping with my drop and run organizational style), it "lived" on the counter in my office. After a while, though, that started to bug me. I'd worked hard to clear off that counter and, the bin, while organizationally useful, had a rather large footprint. I moved it to the floor, which was also not a great solution, but it was accessible and I figured I'd deal with it at the end of the semester.

Which arrived two weeks ago. It was time.

So, for the past two weeks, I've been chipping away, one project at a time. Integrating the bin into my existing systems was the first step and, in a small office, it was more giant step than baby step. Plan A didn't work, but it resulted in a new configuration for the top of my desk. This led to the purchase of a long-sought-after clip on lamp to resolve the lighting issue that had become even more apparent with the advent of Zoom sessions. I'm debuting it tonight at my critique group meeting to see if it withstands the acid test of an evening meeting. The reconfiguration also led to me taking a file sorter that was more decorative than functional (and was therefore not earning its keep) and pressing it into service, so that it now does more than look pretty.

Next up was the small, round table imported from my parents' house. Its portability gives me the functionality of the L-shaped desk I crave, but that won't fit into my tiny office. This only works, however, when it's not littered with a collection of notes and reading material, so that was step two. 

In the process of all of this weeding, clearing and filing, it's become evident that I need a better system for my many writing projects and ideas. And, as I mentioned last week, I also need a home for all the materials I'm gathering for a newish class I'm teaching next semester. These projects are next up. They'll not only help me feel less scattered, but they also have the added advantage of allowing me to procrastinate. The file box with the contents of my relocated file cabinet will be the last to go, unless I make good on developing the habit of clearing out three files after dinner at least three times a week.

At five feet nothing and with limited athletic prowess, I'm not much of a volleyball player. I do, however, remember the concept of rotating so that everyone on the team gets a chance to serve, and it comes to mind every time I do one of these office mini-makeovers. I almost always have everything I need, but, at the end of the process, many existing team members have taken on new roles. 

Though it sometimes frustrates me that I never seem to be "finished," I'm beginning to accept that as a reflection of a life that continues to grow and change, and that's a very good thing. Taking this process step-by-step and doing it in multiple sessions not only gives me a chance to absorb the changes so I can remember where things are, it builds in a way to weed out the old to make room for the new. For every item that needs to claim its space, there's one (or more) to get rid of, and, next to clear spaces, that's the part of organization that I like best.

In the final weeks of the semester, I'd begun to dread walking into my office at home. Doing so only made me long for a day when I could grab a book to read for fun and go wherever I wanted in the house to enjoy doing just that. For the past week, I've loved walking into my office. Part of that clearly has to to with the fact that my fall semester tasks are complete, but much of it has to do with the fact that I've reclaimed the space as an organized oasis -- or at least made significant progress in that direction.

Life brings its hectic times, but it also brings us opportunities to recover, even if the balance feels far from perfect. Within those routines -- or the lack thereof -- we find turning points that can spark our desire to purge, to clear, to grow and to organize.

What are your turning points?

3 Keys Thursday: 3 Keys to Getting Started

'Tis the season for feeling disorganized. Though we might all "need a little Christmas" (to borrow a line from Mame) now more than ever, adding shopping and shipping, baking and decorating to our socially distanced, work-from-home, wear-a-mask world can be pretty overwhelming.

Where do we start?

Start with what's most important. It could be most important because it's time-sensitive, it's been on the list for a while, or someone else is waiting for it. Or, its importance can be subjective, and clear only to us. If it's a priority (regardless of why this is the case), getting it done will yield an emotional payoff, freeing your energy for other tasks.

Start with the thing you most want to tackle. Motivation is a powerful driver. If we're in the mood to tackle a task, it often gets done more quickly and painlessly. The size of the task doesn't really matter. Checking off any task we want to get done gives us a sense of accomplishment.

Start with the thing that will take the least amount of time. Checking off a succession of small tasks can also be motivating. In addition, this strategy works well when we have just a few minutes between activities or appointments. The big piles might have to wait, but the quick tasks can be accomplished and released from our endlessly scrolling mental list.

As I move through my pile-up of piles, I'm using all of these strategies. Some days, I feel motivated to dig in; other days, I prefer to putter, and, on many days, I find that my plan goes awry when the first thing I tackle leads me to another and another...

And so on.

In the end, where we start matters much less than simply getting started. So, look around, choose a task, and dig in. 

Before you know it, you'll be checking it off the list.

True Confessions Wednesday: Organizing is Fun!

True confession #49: I organize for fun. If you read this blog regularly, I'm sure this doesn't come as a surprise, especially since I recently wrote about how much I enjoy the problem-solving aspect of organizing.

During one of the last Sundays of the semester, as I struggled to figure out what remained to be done in each class and how I needed to organize the content, I found myself getting crabbier and crabbier. I knew I needed a break, but I didn't want to start something I'd get pulled into and not want to stop doing. So, I set a timer for fifteen minutes and dug into the box of files behind my desk (more on that later). Fifteen minutes, an overstuffed trash can (I was rather ruthless), a handful of recycling, and eleven empty file folders later, I actually did feel better. 

Lighter.

Sorting and purging has that effect on me.

The box in question is just one of several hot spots that have cropped up in the past month as I struggled to balance end--of-semester tasks with the onset of holiday decorating and an influx of Santa-related packages. The box of files -- the largest and most intrusive of the piles -- is the last remnant of an office revamp that relegated my long-neglected file cabinet to the basement (where archival storage belongs). While it would have been easier to just put everything back in the drawers, I wasn't convinced I needed everything that was in the drawers, especially since I couldn't actually remember what was in the drawers. So, I'd tossed all the files into a box, planning to sort through it a few files at a time and create a filing system more in line with what I need now.

It was a good plan in theory, but you know what happens to the best-laid plans. And what road good intentions pave.

So, the box, along with its smaller, less-contained counterparts, has been calling out to me for the past couple of weeks, each stack doing its part to distract me from the more time-sensitive tasks at hand. But now, with the bulk of those tasks checked off my list, the fun part has arrived.

I get to organize.

To make things even more fun, I have my pick of the projects. Last night, I got started on some of the papers in my office that needed to be sorted and filed (in addition to the box of files). I also need to find a way to organize the books and papers I'm accumulating as I plan to teach a newish (taught for the first and last time two years ago) course this spring.

I have a kitchen cabinet overhaul to do, thanks to a splurge on new dishes, along with new pots and pans to go with the (necessary) new stove. Most of the cookware has found a home, but I need to do a little more thinking about the right homes for a few sentimental items taken from my mom's cupboards that have been displaced by the changes.

Oh, and there's Christmas decorating, along with finding temporary homes for everything displaced (are you sensing a theme here?) by the Christmas stuff. And Christmas presents I dare not use an I know I put it somewhere approach with or I'll be giving them out on St. Patrick's Day.

While some would find all of this overwhelming, I (mostly) find it exciting. So many possibilities for purging things I no longer need and creating clear space! 

If you're not sure when you'll have time to dig in,
look for opportunities to make piles smaller
a little bit at a time.

Thanks to a combination of better habits and a largely paper-free semester, things look much better (kitchen changes notwithstanding) than they have at the end of previous semesters. One personal victory is my desk, which I have consistently cleared off each night for a record number of months. This is a success that has not only sustained me, but motivated me to keep other clear spaces clear as well.

When things get busy, it's easy to fall into piles, especially for those of us who have I need to see it personal styles and/or drop and run organizational styles. But, with a success or two to remind us of what we can do when the dust settles and blocks of time, whether small or large, open up, organizing can be something we look forward to.

Lemme at those piles. 

Thursday Then & Now: It's Beginning to Look a Bit Like Christmas

Now: With Thanksgiving behind me and all but one set of presentations, one set of papers and a few inevitable odds and ends remaining, I've finally started inviting Christmas music into my home and car. My husband and daughter are ready to tackle the next steps -- in fact, they put up our Christmas village last weekend -- but I want to put the semester behind me before I dig in. The last semester and a half have led me to need a little Christmas, and I want to savor every bit.

This Christmas seems very different in a number of ways but, as the post below from four years ago reminded me, the important things remain the same (including choosing whether or not to go out among the revelers, albeit for different reasons). 

Perhaps best of all, I have more than three days till Christmas to tackle lists A, B & C.

How about you? Are you feeling merry or mopey?

Then:

Three days until Christmas. Ready or not, here it comes!

I'm not ready, but I'm also not stressed. Of course, it helps to stay in the house and away from the traffic and panic going on "out there." 

If I sound calmer than I did yesterday, that's because my gradesare done, placing the fall semester behind me. And today, I checked a few Christmas things off my list.

Maybe I'm less stressed because now that all three of us are back in the same house, the most important part of Christmas is already taken care of. Maybe, after surviving four fall semesters, I've finally got this crazy, last minute stuff figured out.
Or maybe I'm living happily in denial.

In any event, Christmas will be here in three days. I can enjoy the process, or I can make myself a nervous wreck. Here's how I plan to do the former:

Prioritize. Last week, I wrote about my priorities. None of them was directly related to Christmas, but each of them was something that had to be done prior to Christmas. Now, I'm ready to move on to the B list -- the things that must be done in the next two days. Behind the B list, there's a C list -- the things I'd like to do, but have accepted I might not get to. With three days to Christmas, there is no D list -- anything that far down the list has long since been jettisoned, along with the guilt that accompanies its removal.

Don't take on other people's stress. These items would be the E list. My husband, for example, loves to take on"necessary" household tasks right before the holidays. He'll deny this, and when he does, I'll remind him of the wall he decided to dispense with a week before a Christmas open house we were hosting about twenty years ago. (I might not remember yesterday, but I remember when walls disappear). When I suggest that some of these things can keep until after Christmas, I get nowhere. I can either take on the additional tasks (and stress) or I can pitch in as I'm able while staying focused on my own lists. Since I'm perfectly capable of stressing myself out without any outside assistance, I prefer not to outsource.

Don't forget to have fun. A sense of humor is probably the most important thing to keep in your pre-Christmas toolkit. As time ticks away, so do patience and energy, and it's all too easy to take the merry out of Christmas. Nurture that sense of humor by remembering to sit down and take a break occasionally, even if you can only squeeze in a few minutes of downtime. There's no thing so important that it's worth all of your time and energy.

Regardless of what you celebrate, how you celebrate it, or with whom, I wish you a season of relaxation and celebration.

And, of course, STYLE.

True Confessions Wednesday: Accepting Our Styles

True Confession #48: Sometimes, it's hard to accept our styles. 

Although the heart of organizing by style is embracing our default styles and building from there, let's face it: sometimes, it's hard to let go of what we think we should be doing. When we come up against an organizing challenge and someone suggests a tried-and-true tool like a binder or a file cabinet, we might be comfortable saying they don't work for us, but still a bit sensitive to the eye-roll or argument that may follow. 

I mean, those tools work for everyone, right?

Only they don't. And finding what does can be a challenge. It can require reconfigurations that we love but others don't understand. (Just ask my husband what he thinks of my open-top files in the family room). It can reinforce the idea that, for us, organizing hasn't always been second-nature.

Only it can be. 

I've been organizing by style for thirteen years and I don't miss filing cabinets at all. In fact, I've even been known to invite the occasional pretty, visually appealing binder back into my office, provided it follows my rules. And, while I still revert to piling when things get busy or I'm in the middle of an organizing project, it's a temporary stopgap measure, not an organizational system. Most of all, I protect clear space now with a ferocity I didn't know I had when it came to organization, and I'm immune to the eyeballs of my audience when I do so.

Never come between a Jersey girl and her clear space.

I know I've said it hundreds of times before, but organizing is a process. But, the process of accepting ourselves as we are -- whether it comes to organizing or anything else -- isn't always easy or fast. So, let me ask you this: is organizing by style working for you? 

If it is, keep doing what you're doing because it only gets easier with practice.

And, while you're at it, tell that inner voice that's making it hard for you to accept your styles (Your parents? Your sixth grade teacher? That girl in your math class who always had everything together and got straight As?) that you've got this. 

The more you tell them, and the better you get at this, the more you'll believe it, and the better you'll get at strengthening perhaps the most important organizing tool of all. 

Self-confidence.

You've got this.

3 Keys Thursday: 3 Keys to Having a Happy Thanksgiving

As I finish writing this post, I'm full of turkey, which means I'm behind schedule. This was supposed to posted early in the day, made possible by the fact that my husband is in charge of all meals containing turkey.

But it still didn't happen. I considered ditching this post altogether -- I mean, who'd know? -- but decided it was never too late to have a Thanksgiving frame of mind.

Be grateful. I know, it's kind of the meaning of the holiday but, admittedly, this year it's a bit of a challenge. All the more reason to focus on what we have, even if it's not exactly what we want. The benefits of gratitude are numerous, making it worthwhile to make today the day we make counting our blessings a regular habit.

Be hopeful. This year's Thanksgiving is the first of its kind in our lifetime, and I have to believe that the sacrifices we're making are in the service of better celebrations to come. It's hard to be hopeful in light of all we have lost but, without hope, things feel even worse. Optimism doesn't mean denying reality; it means believing there are better days ahead.

Monicore via Pixabay

Be kind. However we celebrate, close quarters and high anxiety are likely part of the day. Respecting boundaries, even if we don't agree with or even understand them, and reaching out in kindness, whether it's offering to do the dishes or leaving a generous tip for those who are working today, can be a bright spot in a November that feels even darker than usual.

However you celebrate, and with whomever, I wish you a wonderful Thanksgiving. Here's to pulling out all the stops next year.

True Confessions Wednesday: Problem Solving

True confession #47: Organizing feeds my problem-solving side. 

I don't know why it took me so long to figure this out but, there you have it. I love how organizing helps me begin with chaos, brainstorm a solution, put it into action, and end up with order. 

From this perspective, organizing by STYLE was a game changer because it gave me a lens through which to view both the clutter and the eventual solution. Knowing something about how things need to look when I'm finished (I need to see them and I need to be able to put them away quickly, often on my way to the "next thing") makes it easier to get from order to chaos. In addition, I love the challenge of finding the "just right" container -- one that fits the space, serves the purpose, and looks good in the process. Best of all, I love the clear space that results when the clutter gets sorted, the excess gets purged, and the treasures get put away. 

It's a wonderful feeling of accomplishment.

But, the true test of any solution is whether or not it's sustainable long-term. Some spots require a bit of trial and error while others are easily whipped into shape. When that happens, I'm one step closer to my unattainable goal: a perfectly organized life.

A girl can dream.

3 Keys Thursday: 3 Keys for Deciding Whether or Not to do One Last Thing

Yesterday, I wrote a mea culpa blog post. Today I wore a "The goal is peace, not perfection" T-shirt and jeans to class. 

It’s one of those weeks. And, lately, several of them have collided.

Ideally, we learn not to overbook ourselves in the first place. In reality, however, sometimes the things we want to do insert themselves into our schedules at inopportune times, or on days that are already full. While it's sometimes possible to plan around these collisions, there are times when things are scheduled when they're scheduled and we just have to make it work.

As I alternately limp/slide/dance into the end of the semester, I'm having a lot of those days. Here are three key ideas I'm trying to keep in mind.

Just because there are still hours left in the day (until midnight) does not mean I need to complete a task today. That was where I found myself last night. I'd had a blog post idea early in the day, but the list of things I needed to do between idea and execution was long enough that I found myself trying to eke out a post during the 11:00 news. Not smart. (Also not the first time). When I finally gave myself permission to write my stream-of-consciousness list post (a proposition that was both simpler and faster), I managed to get something posted with much less angst and drama than laboring through the initial post would have generated. Sometimes good enough really is good enough -- and now I even have a post planned for next week. 

Think priorities. Is that thing on the list one of the most valuable things in our life? If not, is it worth sacrificing the things that are valuable (family, sleep) just to check it off the list? Stephen Covey's exhortation to put first things first is a good rule to live by. Sometimes, we get so caught up in our lists and other people's priorities that we forget about the unspoken items at the very top of the list. Hanging out with my daughter (the activity that pushed that blog post over the top) really was more important than writing the post I set out to write in the first place.

Take a page out of Scarlet O’Hara‘s book. Tomorrow really is another day. Will everything fall apart if what’s left on the list waits until then?

There will always be times when we are overwhelmed, and times when we struggle to balance our responsibilities to others with responsibility to ourselves. The funny thing is that cutting ourselves some slack is perhaps the best thing we can do for everyone involved. 

So, go ahead. Curl up with that cup of tea or glass of wine and nudge those last few items onto a list for another day (better yet, delegate them!) A little down time now might just be the thing that lifts you up for tomorrow.

It's the last full week of a very unusual semester. I had a blog post topic all picked out and ready to go but it is now after midnight. I tried to write it, but my brain refused to cooperate.

So, instead, I thought I'd share with you what I did today instead of writing a blog post.

• I taught two split classes, with half of my students on Zoom and half in the room.

• I graded some assignments and returned a few student emails. 

• I did a CVS run to pick up a gift card, a prescription and spend my Extra-Care bucks.

• I unpacked the new dishes I ordered (well, I took the small boxes out of the big box, anyway. The actual unpacking and rearranging of cupboards will have to wait until next week).

• I did a little sorting in my office to keep the paper piles from multiplying.

• I read a manuscript for tonight's critique group meeting and a chapter in one of the NBIC books I got in the mail yesterday. 

• I made dinner and ate with my family. 

• I attended a virtual writer's group meeting and a virtual critique group meeting.

• I placed two online orders.

• I had some down time with my daughter.

In other words, I did what any number of moms do on any given Wednesday.

So why am I sharing it here?

Because this has been a very unusual semester and, for the first time in close to five years, this blog has taken a hit. And I want you to know I'm neither lazily eating bon bons nor ignoring you.

Next week, everything shifts again. Classes end and it's all over but the grading (and final presentations). 

And I will have time to do more than think up post topics. If all goes according to plan, I'll have time to write them too, and get that third Marita/Angel/Charli book out. 

I can't wait.

3 Keys Thursday: 3 Key Questions for that Maybe Moment

Almost three years ago, I declared the upcoming year my Year of No. Like many people, I have a tendency to take on too much (can you identify, I love to be busy friends?) I was determined to develop the habit of stepping back and taking a moment to think before I committed.

The other day, a new kind of writing project came my way. As you can imagine, I have a weak spot for writing-related projects, but I also have a substantial pile of writing projects in progress. 

Do I need another one?

If you, too, have found yourself in this situation, here are three questions that might help with the decision-making process.

Do I have to do it? There are plenty of things I'd say no to if I could, but they're necessary to keep our household running or required by my employer. These are things that make the list, whether it's the year of no or not. Several examples spring readily to mind, but I shall refrain from naming them on the grounds that they'll make me look bad.

Does it make me happy or serve a purpose that matters to me? It's rare that I actually have an empty space on my calendar that's begging to be filled but if an opportunity arises that excites me, does good, or advances a cause or goal that matters to me, I'll probably say yes and make room one way or another. A perfect example of this arose around the same time I established my Year of No, kicking it off spectacularly by auditioning for a scripted show for the first time in almost two decades. The gains were more than worth the losses, especially since the former included friendships that continued far beyond the last curtain call.

Am I doing this because I want to or because someone else wants me to? This is the hardest one. There were times that the "no" that protected my time made someone else unhappy, or even angry. The line between self-care and selfish can feel precariously thin but, in the end, since the time expenditure is mine, so, too, is the final decision -- and any fallout that arises.

Learning to step back and create a maybe moment between the request and the assent has helped to ensure that I'm spending my time on the things I want to spend time on, even if I do still overcommit more often than I ought to. And, when I say no, more often than not what I feel is relief, not regret.

As for that writing project, I've decided not to decide -- yet. I need to do more research on just how complicated and time consuming it will be, and whether or not it's a good fit for me and vice versa. Only then will I know if it's something I want to pursue. So, I'm taking my time, and pondering my three questions, and making sure my answer is the right one for me.

The Whys of Organization

Organization is, indeed, a process -- a dynamic approach that allows us to live in harmony with our things, instead of just focusing on putting things away. Each of us has different reasons for wanting to be organized -- the "why" behind our desire to strengthen both our skills and our systems. 

Our "why" becomes the momentum that drives the process; whether we organize to find things when we need them, to enjoy the sense of mastery a clear space brings with it, or to create a sense of peace around us, our "why" shapes our systems and plays a role in our styles. What an organizational system based on our whys and our styles lacks in perfection, it makes up for in efficiency because we have fit it into our lives instead of the other way around.

When I was writing Know Thyself, I asked some friends about their whys, and I thought it would be fun to share some of them here. 

Can you identify? Or is your why something completely different?

A Week of Organization

jackmac34 via Pixabay

Regular readers know I'm a big fan of taking small steps. But, when clutter encroaches, small steps don't seem like enough.

How about one small step every day? Try out the organizational acrostic below to make a little bit of progress in a lot of spaces over the course of a week, whether you've got five minutes, fifteen minutes or an hour. 

Magazine Monday. Grab a pile of magazines or catalogs (let the amount of time you have dictate the size of the pile you start out with). Toss or recycle the ones you no longer want. Find a home for any you want to keep. The bonus round: Stop subscriptions to anything you tossed out unread.

Toss it Tuesday. Find a surface that's supposed to be clear (but isn't) and sort things into two piles: keep or get rid of. Decide what to do with the things you no longer want (throw away, recycle, give away, consign). Save the rest for tomorrow. The bonus round: Actually deliver the giveaways and consignables to their destination.

What do I do with this Wednesday. Return to yesterday's "keep" pile and find a home for everything in it. The bonus round: As you put things away, pick up anything else you see that goes in the same place(s).

Think it through Thursday. Find a spot in your house that needs an organizational upgrade. What do you like about the system you have now? What needs improvement? With your preferred styles and container styles in mind, can you think of a better solution? The bonus round: Give a new container a test run to see if it solves the problem.

File it Friday. Dig into that "to be filed" pile and make some progress. More paperless than paper-heavy? Take a look at your inbox and see what needs to be filed -- or deleted -- there. The bonus round: Choose one file folder and sort through it, getting rid of outdated paperwork.

Stylin' Saturday. Take a space from practical organization to pretty organization. Add a dash of color or a pattern like plaid or paisley, or replace a worn or boring container with one that makes you smile every time you use it. The bonus round: Use colored boxes or file folders inside a drawer to jazz it up and make it easier to find what you're looking for.

Siesta Sunday. Take a break! You've earned it. 

Two Tools for Every Style

Pixabay

When it comes to Organizing by STYLE, individuality is key. We identify our styles and use them to create organizational systems that fit and are, therefore, sustainable.

But even though our systems work best when they're individualized, the same tool often works for many styles. Here are two tools that can be personalized to fit every style.

Lists. While these serve as proof of accomplishment for the I need to see it personal style, they serve as item locators for those with the I know I put it somewhere organizational style and as a plan of attack for those with an I love to be busy personal style. Whether they're on brightly colored paper, tucked into a planner, written backwards (things I accomplished today) or forward (things I need to do tomorrow), lists are one of the most adaptable organizational tools ever.

Containers. Choosing containers that match our styles increases our motivation to put things away instead of down, and to use the organizational systems we set up. Cram and jammers whose containers are large and/or flexible are less likely be defeated by crumpled, ripped or broken items. I love stuff folks protect their collections by containing them in ways that keep them safe and out of harm's way. I know I put it somewhere organizers can use clear bins to reveal the safe hiding places for their prized items and those with a drop and run organizational style are more likely to put things where they belong if they simply forgo the lid and go for one-step containing. 

Finding tools that work and adapting them to our styles leads to habits and systems that work because they've arisen out of what comes naturally. And, once we learn to use those tools consistently, we're on the path to easy upkeep.

3 Keys Thursday: 3 Small Steps to Brighten Your Surroundings

Most of us have been spending a lot more time at home, which can give us plenty of time to identify places in our homes that would benefit from a bit of our attention. Unfortunately, seeing them doesn't always give us the energy and/or motivation to do anything about them.

Want to take a small step toward organization? Here are three ideas to get you started.

One container upgrade. Is there a container that's not earning its keep? One that works or has seen better days? Treat yourself to something new with the same features. Brightening up the space can pay organizing and decorating dividends.

One space that needs work. If you're like me, you don't have to look far to find an area that could benefit from some improvement. Once you've identified the area, take a moment and look around again. What's working in a similar space, or to store similar items? Can you import an idea that's working into a space that isn't?

Help a family member identify a solution that works with their styles. Now, while we're all close together for long periods of time, other people's dilemmas can bother us more than usual. If they bother the other person too, perhaps together, you can brainstorm some ideas that might work with their styles. This has the potential to be a win-win, especially if the space is bothering you, too. 

Having time on our hands or being in the right place at the right time can be beneficial to our organizing efforts, but it's not a promise of success. Taking small steps can yield big payoffs, and the sense of accomplishment that results might even nudge us on to other projects as well.